was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
He kissed a someone with a penis
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
being pregnant is like rehab
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
