I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize