if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
