This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
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