my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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