Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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