i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
This gyro tastes like lonliness
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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