she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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