called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
