did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize