i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
