The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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