After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize