She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize