Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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