It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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