You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
