I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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