i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
