There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I lost the right to judge tonight
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
