Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
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