I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
