After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
