Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
