Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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