i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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