i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
