Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
