Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
