he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
