he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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