That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
