Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
