My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize