p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize