I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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