yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
