all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
