I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
