...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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