lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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