I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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