Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
i now understand why vodka
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
