She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
