Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize