you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
