? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Randomize
