yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
