I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
