Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
our cab driver is having phone sex.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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