i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Randomize
