stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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