shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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