who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
